Ed was with me before and after the Sunday service. It's been a long a time he's been off to church matters and glad that God answered my prayer--to bring him back to the church again.

I know he missed those things, too. Sing and praise God though sometimes he make it as a rock and roll; listen to the preacher and laugh guiltily as the message speaks to him; talk wide-mouthed with the youth about the things he can't open when we're inside the house; and to be counselled by Elder Jerry or Tatay Del whenever his problems are no longer handful.

I love Ed. I love Ed as I almost meddle his teenage life and sometimes, I try to be an elder sister to him. We exchange advice. We share a lot of secrets more than what we can share to our friends. He is the only one I could talk to about the boys that court me as well as about the guys I really want to refuse (Not being choosy, it is just that they can't stand as my ideal guy) but he often says, "pag-isipan mo munang mabuti... Baka isang araw tomboy ka na..." (in deadpan tone). He speaks frankly and soberly but I always felt the concern. Indeed, what am I now is what he has been wanting me--to be a conservative and not-fond-with-boys girl (Am I?).

I am just wondering what to do after my younger sister, April, told me something hard about Ed. He's smoking covertly and she (April) tells me that Ed is afraid of me and he don't want me to know about the darn thing he's been doing. It's a whack on my head.

No. "No" not because I don't want him to smoke (honestly it's his right to do so and as a teenager he can't easily avoid such things) but "No" because I've been too much busy to myself and to my school works and I almost neglected my poor, sober, problematic and emotional Ed. What to do? What to say?

I have observed him these days and what my younger sister said to me was being proved by his smell--those damn smell of cigs.

He probably have his problem and I can't figure it out. I want to help him but I don't know how. I want to ask him why he do that but my tongue goes backward whenever I see his once-in-a-blue-moon, true smile. And I don't want to steal it.

His smoking didn't matter that much but his problem does. I don't know what's the best way to approach him. 

I care, and Him above cares better. Like what Bob Marley's song says, "evr'y little thing's gonna be alright..."